In reply to the American Thinker blog post about it:
President Obama gave the commencement address to the Class of 2010 at West Point on Saturday, and his performance hardly lived up to his reputation as a masterful orator.
Honestly, I am baffled by Obama's "reputation as a masterful orator." I've heard that since before the 2007 campaign, but he has never impressed me with his delivery. He comes across as brusque, harsh, and cold, and overall his addresses lack the finesse and eloquence that is compelling and captivating. But then again, people said Hitler was an awesome charismatic speaker and I thought his speeches were super aggressive (which to me causes a negative reaction), but maybe that appeals to certain audiences or translates well in huge crowds; I don't know. There aren't many people I would consider great public speakers in terms of delivery; my college president was quite good, and I would consider Ronald Reagan good too (being an actor has that advantage); I know I've heard a few other good ones, but nobody really jumps out to me offhand. In terms of content, I thought W's speeches were often very eloquently worded; whoever his writers were, were very good, in my opinion.
Anyway. I read through the text and I really don't see anything "wrong" with what he said, even in the paragraphs you quoted, except that it sounds really different from my class's commencement address. Maybe because it's for an army school. I always expect commencement speeches to be something like "be an individual, carpe diem, pursue your dreams, change the world, what do you want on your tombstone," etc. This kind of sounded like a regular old public appearance foreign policy speech. Maybe that was appropriate for the group; I've never read a commencement speech that was delivered at West Point or any other military academy before, so I wouldn't know. I did think this part was pretty lame though:
To the United States Corps of Cadets, and most of all, the Class of 2010 - it is a singular honor to serve as your Commander-in-Chief. As your Superintendent indicated, under our constitutional system my power as President is wisely limited. But there are some areas where my power is absolute. And so, as your Commander-in-Chief, I hereby absolve all cadets who are on restriction for minor conduct offenses. (Applause.) I will leave the definition of "minor" - (laughter) - to those who know better. (Laughter.)
But I'm just the kind of person who doesn't really go for things like that. You want me to laugh, tell a funny story. Canon Andrew White told stories about his kid wanting to invite Yasser Arafat to his birthday party; now that is a way to get an audience to warm up to you.